KINOULTON, NOTTINGHAMSHIRE 1997
Bryan and Alan's informative letter dated 25 September 1996 from the Pikehand Archive 1997
PIKEHAND WEEKEND 1997
THEME : FITNESS AND FUN
Alan has my address and I have his phone number so all is well. The date for the above is:-
Thursday evening May 15 through to the afternoon of Sunday 18 May.
Some months later a letter arrived having this declaration:-
We have spent most waking hours trying to resolve the location, a place of sufficient size and standard to accommodate the dignity of the mature Pike. Our problem is that all the activities are on the South Coast, whilst the only place able to accommodate the exact needs of the Pikes was in the Midlands. Lengthy discussions with the treasurer did not help.....his broken record technique of :- 'think budget, think budget, think budget,' left us feeling somewhat bereft.
There were some other inclusions; but why should organiser bore us with bitching? on with the weekend!
Alan and Bryan were organisers. Also attending were Bob, Graham, Jeff, Kev (a new PIKEHAND), Neil, Nick.C, Pete and Ray.
Pikes began to arrive in dribs and drabs at the village pub the Neville Arms. Soon our group numbers were complete including much joking and laughter. We had a meal in the pub and then departed to Alan's house where some Pikes had beds but the rest made do on the floor in sleeping bags or possibly blow up mattresses. It was just as well that Claire and the children had evacuated for the duration for which we all give our thanks as the evening activity could not "bare" other participants. As usual there was beer, cheese and sandwiches to feed upon so it was not all bad.
A kit inspection received short shrift as was now common. The evening activity was, however, a Body Mass Index test. With curtains obliterating the view from outside and all photos exclude from these pages we all stripped down to under pants. In turn each Pike's height was measured and his weight taken for comparison against a chart which was the strict domain of the organisers. They did elected to take part in the activity to which we all agreed, as they are always right and have to be obeyed!! Pikes were no longer the sylphs of youth and with the added mass of beer consumed they looked a sorry mess. We could no longer attract any of the five voyeur types. Pikes in pants sinking pints is not a pretty sight. Finally we made our way to our respective sleeping arrangments without the faintest idea what points we had scored from the activity.
After breakfast the following morning we boarded a people carrier that Alan had hired so that we could have a few drinks without risk as he was the, tea total for the day, driver. So all travelled in safety to a destination and activity unknown. We arrived at the then National White Water Sports Centre at Holme Pierrepont. We were all kitted out with wet suits. They were so tight that it's surprising that no one contracted thrombosis. We each wore a life jacket as well and were issued with a paddle. Two rubber dinghies of different sizes were displayed outside. We were appointed a leader for each dinghy. They deployed us so that there were an even number of Pikes allocated to each. The smaller dinghy had four Pikes as crew. Safety and methods were demonstrated. "Don't let go of your paddle no matter what!" was important. Obviously the current would carry it away and we'd be up the creek without a paddle. If you were tipped out upon surfacing you were to grab hold of the rope secured all around the dinghy and await rescue. Then a demonstration on how to recover a colleague from the water. One leader crouched down on his knees and chose Pete as the man to be rescued. The leader was about half Pete's size. He grabbed Pete saying we were to push the victim under then lift rapidly. He hauled Pete into the dingy with remarkable ease, low body mass index presumably. We floated our respective dinghies on a large lake at the head of the rapids. Each leader showed us how to secure our feet in loops attached to the dingy and instructed us to paddle around the lake. Then we were told we must immediately obey the commands "Lean left," "Lean right," "Paddle right," "Paddle left," he would shout dependent upon the conditions encountered on the run. Then he directed us to paddle towards the lake overflow through an archway.
First the larger dinghy followed, after a time delay, by the smaller dinghy headed over the weir into the rapids. There was no turning back now. With a foot jammed in the constraining strap at each paddling position instantly reponding to the commands the craft bumped, splashed, twisted, heaved, accelerated, braked and threw the crews around. There was no time to think, just repond to the commands that were coming thick and fast. At one point the smaller craft, cresting an extra high wave, slid sideways down into the crashing void below under the loud command, "lean right!" Try as we might we had no control. It stalled suddenly at the bottom and up ended dumping leader and crew into the raging torrent. The leader managed to get the boat into a circulation pool and shallows. Three companions, firmly attached to the dingy rope, dragged the boat out. The leader was away down the banking to catch Pete who had been unable to grab the rope. We followed quickly. In another circulation pool was Pete eyes shut to ensure his lenses were safe and tightly gripping his paddle. The leader circulated with him and in three circles guided him to the shallows. An eager Pikehand reached from the coping and grabbed Pete's hand. Pete calmly exclaimed, "I'm 'ing paying for this!" We returned to our grounded craft and all boarded once we'd floated it in the circulation pool. Then out into the current to continue our riotous journey. We'd hardly started again when the dinghy was flipped over and we were all underneath. It was not very difficult to reach out and feel for the safety rope then haul yourself into fresh air. Our leader ensured that we were all safe but we drifted below the last circulation pool where our paddles had been recovered other by other rapids users. Gently the flow carried us out into the River Severn. Our only means of manoeuvring was to paddle with our feet and by this means we managed to get to a mooring where we and the dinghy were once more on dry land. It was a long trek back. It is surprising how heavy a little rubber boat gets even when carried four Pikes. By consensus the crew decided not attempt another run.
Meanwhile the larger dingy was not without incident. It had stopped in a semi-quiet water area. A crew member hung over the front of the dingy. The remaining crew paddled out into a swirling pool and the Pike on the front had a face down dunking. Returning to the pool another Pike hung over the front and was dunked in the same way. This continued until all Pikes had experienced dunking. Moving out from there into the main flow a violent movement of the craft threw Nick over the side. All rescue training was abandoned. Pikes were standing and shouting. Fearing that Nick could not swim Graham plunged in and in vice like grip pinned him against the side of the dinghy. Nick could have breathed easier under water. The other Pikes almost turned the boat over in desparation to retrieve him. Graham released his grip and Nick took a much needed gulp of air. Later Nick confided that he could swim but just did not like water. Meanwhile Graham spurned recueing hands and made a valient effort to swim up stream whilst the dinghy was swept down stream. Giving up the hopeless effort Graham turned and made his way to a circulation pool and escaped.
All Pikes eventually assembled and cleaned up. They had been advised to drink a can of coke from the restaurant after showering as this would protect each of them from the inevitable River Severn's version of "Montezuma's Revenge!" Bob had not heard the advice so he was a little reserved. He did partake of lunch. After lunch there was the beer trail which yeilded the following results. Now Pikes do not give up so Bob did have half a pint of Bass. He lost points off his score due to his reticence but he didn't care. Back at the digs it was wash and brush up time for the Pikes. We were off to a restaurant where we indulged ourselves. Then later to the Nottingham Playhouse where we experienced our first play on a Pikehands Weekend.
Following breakfast the people carrier under the control of Alan headed for another secret destination.
Pikes were considerably dismayed when we arrived in the car park at Rutland Water Reservior. No more water activities please were their silent pleas? Silent because all were aware of the points they could forfeit by making a complaint. Upon entry to the reception centre our worries were allayed, or so we thought. Our wonderful organisers had planned for a cycling activity.
There was still some query among the Pikes because our imaginations ran wild with all the tasks that they may have in store for us. Each Pike was armed with a bike and informed we were to ride around the reservior. It was OK because we'd taught Ray how to ride at Oxford and he now had a fold up bike he kept in his car and used regularly. Our group set off together in a clockwise direction on the cycle path around the lake. Well it was not all cycle path as some road travel was required to navigate a full circuit. On off road sections we were amung trees on dry and muddy tracks.
There was an appreciable amount of up riding both on the track and metalled road. This proved a somewhat challenging part of the journey for some Pikes who walked up. This split the group and took more time than we'd imagined. However the pull of a liquid lunch accompanied by a morsel of food was more than a spur for some. We all arrived at the Horse and Lockey Inn in time to fully partake of the restful atmosphere. However this pub was only about half the circuit. It was a band of reluctant Pikes that once more mounted their be-spoked steeds departing the sanctuary for the wayfare. More hills to the chagrin of Pikes. Eventually our mostly exhausted band arrived at our starting point. Little did some of them realise that the next morning they would ache all over and be very sore in their nether regions. Back at the digs some voted to watch the cup final on TV whilst Alan suggested another venture for those who were willing.
Once more the willing hobbled into the van and we were off to another destination. A bird sanctuary. A very interesting afternoon. Alan is a twitcher and pointed out a number of different species. They enhanced the wetland area which the Pikes enjoyed. Back at the digs where the football wes over which some pikes slept through. It was time to tidy ourselves up prior to heading out for a meal. Later at the digs we rounded off the evening with the usual beer, bread and cheese.
Leisurely the next morning after breakfast and clearing we held our conference. That over we ventured to a stream close by our digs. We strolled along the path beside it to Hickling for a pint and lunch. There was a skittle alley at the rear of the pub. The floor was grossly uneaven. Pikes played a game or two. Play was not helped because the wooden balls were not at all round. To cap it all it was easy for balls to roll between the skittles without touching any of them. Due to the need to drive the Pikes were a little cautious with their drinks. Food was ordered. A new meat was now available in Britain. Ostrich. Quite a few of these were ordered. Bob was still feeling the "Severn" effects so only had a small unadventerous meal. Sitting around after in varied conversations and stories we suddenly became aware that Alan had nodded off. There may be a photo somewhwere. Finally we said our goodbyes, retrieved our cars and headed for home.